At 1st January 2012, I asked myself, how should I define the direction of the Year? And an inspiring title came: “Breaking the Rules”.

Yes indeed the very first hours of the New Year were rule-breaking to me. If I love myself and ignore all other things but my satisfaction, that was alright. If I live within my principles, that were disappointing. I don’t feel bad. I don’t feel sad either. I don’t feel happy for sure. But I don’t feel regret at all. Thinking of another way to celebrate the New Year wasn’t in my must-do list. However, holding on what happened wasn’t a plan, too. One thing I am sure is that, I already torn down some rules I have kept for myself in years. Not a big deal to anyone, and even for me, before and after this, those rules. However, I always preferred to keep them deep in me exactly the way a stubborn naive teenager should have done, keeping good old day habits like a per se part of me.  That is why, ignoring them made me feel like I’ve just walked in a warm crazy bar to drink until knowing nothing, leaving the good friend locked outside and frozen till death in the cold winter night.

I met Loan for an afternoon chat and dinner after that. I wanted to see an inspiring independent tough but tendering woman like her so that my New Year’s thoughts could start positively. And when we sat cosily at a quite cafe right at the crowded junction of Hanoi’s CBD during a cold but sunshine afternoon yesterday, I knew I am going to have an exciting Year. And on the way home, I decided to name Slogan for my 2012: BREAKING THE RULES.

So, how letting down my treasured principles for the first several hours of the 1st Day of 2012 can lead to that thinking? For anyone, maybe no answer because the question is so dumb already. However, for me, a woman living strictly on several things I hold tight into, asking such question make sense and answering it is even making more sense.

First of all, I have been and will be living on modern facilities and technologies comfortably so modern world is definitely my home. My works are the ultimate products of modern lifestyle, no way to deny. In the past, we didn’t need much complicated housing development, and especially urbanization, which is my current subject of work. I like to be independent, being able to speak out my opinions, doing things by my own hands and leading ideas I initiate to reality. For short, I am belong to the modern society.

However, my problem is, at the very core layer, I am a girl born at the 70s of 1900, raised in the rigid society of Vietnam enclosing itself from contacts with outside world. Everyone was living idly even though we could be occupied busily all the time. Those old-fashion old days were present during my 20 first years. I couldn’t separate a nowadays me from a virgin also-me of the past. The grown up woman in myself has to had the nod of the virgin little girl before doing anything. And once that isn’t a deal sealed, my soul and my heart isn’t at ease.

Therefore, the first serious question I asked myself when the 1st Day of 2012 came was, what would I want to lead myself into? Breaking the Rules, that is for sure. And when I am mapping down the Plan of what to do for the whole Year today, Breaking the Rules is suddenly very invaluable.

2012 will be a very difficult year for Vietnam’s Economy, especially the Real Estate Industry. Last year’s last quarter, I have entered a new business – mining. It is very potential and obviously has helped my Company to direct investment out of the sinking property market. This year, that will take at least 1/2 of my time and budget. Thinking of staying in this is a big mentality’s changing to me. Mining in Vietnam is a different world and for a different league. I don’t ever picture a naive me to be suited to such work. However, here I already have entered it and would be staying until saving enough for the other business.

Also in 2012, my Company will officially become a Developer. The property bubble threat is actually good for us in this way. Land cost will be less than few years before. Procedures will be less costly. Competitors will be less fierce. My target is to accumulate good assets that can produce earning yearly and increase land value so that when the economy going up I can rest and relax.

On Bloomberg’s morning London Eye’s interview of Paul Smith at the 1st Jan 2012, he mentioned a concept that changed him from a tiny cloth shop owner to an ambitious designer: “The Job can change you but you can never change the Job”. I watched the interview when I was running on my treadmill. It is so right and fits with my Slogan of this Year: “Breaking the Rules”. The Job can change you so in order to keep a good you, you have to find a good Job. To find a good Job, which is my case, a successful business, new initiatives can be found by looking from the less repetitive activities. Breaking the Rules it is.

I love them now purely and sincerely like my unhurt heart did 15 years ago. During my years abroad, their attitude of never taking anything serious like adults had kept me fresh and well-believed in eternity of good moral. Bad love experiences and failure in business couldn’t turn my eyes to grey because I know good people and good things are around. They and their unchanged view for me as an great independent cool friend who can deal with anything nicely are like the bricks creating a big wall to cover my back when the storm comes. Great friends make great personality. Now that I believe.

He suddenly jumped into my life, saying he was in Saigon at this and that time, and we should meet after two years of not hearing from each other. I wasn’t sure of what it meant but happily to see him as an old friend. Things went like it couldn’t be different afterward. He insisted to meet again and again despite my suspicion. When I finally surrendered to his dates, I also wasn’t sure of how far that was going to go.

It lasted for two years. And during the last two years he repeatedly saying he loved me, but at the same time mentioned he wasn’t serious to commit. I confused all the time and all the time I had to constraint myself of not to miss him, not to think of him, not to build my life around him. It meant I had to live twice stronger to the fact that he sometimes showed up to my city. There were plenty of moments I felt lost and hated him for the awkward situation I was in. I am single and it is very normal I can have a boyfriend. No one is against that. In fact everyone knows me would have been happy for me. Why couldn’t he do that? Why couldn’t I draw a line on that? All the silly things I have relied on to justify the situation weren’t have a platform to stand on at all. They are just silly. I was just silly.

Last month, during the Vietnam’s Independence Holiday, he wrote me a letter saying he couldn’t make any move to be with me officially. Of course that shouldn’t be any problem since I was trying too hard to not think of him as much as I could. But God knows that there was time I just so into him. When I travelled and lived in the peaceful simple life, I know all the things one person should have dreamt about was an easy life with ones’s partner. Nothing much. I thought people are crazy to forget about their happiness in trading for those activities making them tiring all the time.

After reading his e-mail, I went out bursting. I still felt lucky I didn’t do anything that later I had to regret. After that night, I ran out of energy to think of anything relating to him. I was just so drawn up. And I felt my heart gradually became lighter day after day. It wasn’t like the heart-break my second boyfriend did to me. This time, it was much easier because I simply gave up and accepted the fact. It was no commitment from the inception. It was no confirmation of girlfriend-boyfriend thing from the very beginning. It was just sth that shouldn’t have happened already happened.

Even though we never acknowledged each other officially, I still want to consider him as my third boyfriend. I wrote about him when I was in Hoi An – the City I will be living in later. He was the first non-Vietnamese boyfriend I ever had and the most sincere person I ever met. He could end up killing me if he was Vietnamese because if so, he would lie. Thanks Him and Thanks God he didn’t lie so I didn’t rely on a bigger dream that later could intoxicate my whole life. I know the result was bitter but at least, he was sincere to me and I could walk away from him as easy as I am just now.

I didn’t write back to him and I wish he know how I feel. We’d better leave things go back to its previous balance. After him, I know better the type of man that can make life blossom in pairs for me. Thanks Him for that. We both should live well on the path we choose. This is a goodbye, but isn’t just a goodbye but a hello to a happy life at first.

The Sea Life is somehow so easy. No need of fancy clothes. No need of too much headache. No need of modern complication. The Sea provides lots of comfort at ease. Near to the Beach, as long as one has good meal, one is content with his/her own self. That is another code of conduct that city people need to unveil for truly knowing the luxury of being in this world.

1. The scenic Sao Beach – the most breathtaking Beach I’ve ever been to: 

2.  Bai Thom Beach: 

Another view from Bai Thom Beach looking over to the Land of Cambodia (the farthest at the left corner): 

3.  Beach at Ganh Dau: 

4.  The Duong Dong Beach: 

Sunset at Duong Dong Beach:  

5.  Working Scene: 

A young woman pulling the squid net at Sao Beach: 

The net is near, let’s get all hands to hold it up: 

The net pulling tool seating quite on Sao Beach: 

 Two women cutting spikes of a strange fish at Ganh Dau Beach: 

6.   Playing: 

Two hippy French men playing guitar on Sao Beach (Cristelle stopped for a quick chit-chat with them): 

Two little local boys at Bai Thom Beach:

My Scarf for me to lye on Sao Beach: 

A couple staying under the shade on Sao Beach:

7.   Eating:

The Fish at the Restaurant at Ganh Dau Beach: 

A strange Fish – the 1st time I saw this kind of: 

Night Market at Duong Dong Beach: 

8.   Flying:  

Vietnam Airlines tiny Airplane to and from Phu Quoc everyday: 

Cristelle stayed at the same resort I stayed and at a morning of my 2nd day there she approached me, asked if I wanted to share a cab to go around with her. Of course I planned to go around anyhow. However, at the end, we decided to go by motorbike for better exploring. She couldn’t drive. So I took the responsibility. We went to Sao Beach by the incomplete route along the beach southern of the Island. On the way back, the road was better but quite narrow for two lanes with big construction car running up and down. Besides, the rain made it quite dangerous too. I was very cold when we driving back and at some corners up to the mountain was shaken for fear of possible accident. However, Cristelle had trust on me with driving skill (bless her) so I couldn’t fail her but keep moving forward. It took us more than 1 hour driving by motorbike each way. We were thrilled it was over but at the end, it became the highlight of our whole trip.

Cristelle is same same my age. She was a senior manager at KPMG in France. After leaving the Company for a better one, she took a 2 weeks holiday and decided Vietnam. Phu Quoc was the end of her flirt with Asian culture. She loves it. Later we shared a lot of personal stories and realized that, we had so many things in common from working habit to love life. What she was into also what I experienced too. After the morning of going to Sao Beach together, we always seen going out together.

Here are Cristelle at Sao Beach before we preparing to say goodbye to a lovely afternoon. She is shy in front of camera and think she doesn’t look good. However, I think differently:

Here she was went we just arrived:

She loves Monkey. She has lots of puffy Monkeys at home and even brought her favorite to travel on business trip. Here she was feeding the Monkey at the Resort we stayed:

Cristelle in the Jungle:

I was in the Jungle:

Both of us at Bai Thom Beach:

Phu Quoc’s Dogs have various colors: jet black, brown, light yellowy brown, mix of black and brown, dark brown… However, they all share distinctive features: the circles at the top of their back and the long straight stripe of hair running on top back. Most of them are very fit and adorable. Their ears look special and make their whole face sincere and smart. They are famous for the good noses, which can smell their master from 60m away (not certain about the number but surely they can smell real well). People love to talk about their loyalty to their master too. I certainly don’t doubt of that. They are therefore deserved the respect from human, I think.

In spite of being attractive, lovely and loyal, Phu Quoc’s Dogs are not easy to make friend with. Most of them refuse to be touched, unlike the little dogs raised in the city. Do not ever question your dog’s friendliness reputation when a Phu Quoc Dog doesn’t want your hand on his head or even bark loudly at you. They are simply not familiar with being touched and they bark a lot at anyone who are not their master’s family members. Those are their nature. Just ignore the noise and continue to look at them with big smiles. They understand it and even if they don’t bother to be close to you as you wish, don’t feel bad, they are noble so it takes time to present yourself well to them. They deserve that.

When lying on the beach or sitting conveniently at a restaurant, I looked at the Dogs and think, Phu Quoc’s Dogs are really lucky. They have the whole ocean to begin a new day with. They have the silky sand underneath to get their free feet on. They have the clean and fresh air all the time. They have food rampantly because people care well for them. They have plenty of friends to run after each other. In day time, watching them sleeping tight as if no sign of sadness can ever be around, I think they have found the key to the Heaven. They are more than a kind of pet. They are actually invigorating the life at the lovely Island.

Most of the Dogs I have seen there and took pictures do not have personal Name. Some were called “Ki”, but then who’s “Ki” among a dozen of dogs running after the call, the masters could only smile.

I took pictures of those who spent time with me during the 6 days wandering around the Island. Love them all!

Dog 1 – My first encounter. He was sleeping underneath the chair I was sitting for lunch. Later he moved further to get the Sun but then came back. He was sleeping like a Dog, I mean, really really deep:

Dog 2 – A black Dog with the color as dark as an English winter’s night. He is at Sao Beach and love to eat food from my hand:

Here he is sitting in the middle of Cristelle and I. He ignores my hand to waiting for Cristelle’s attention:

But finally he likes my beer:

Dog 3 – He is a little Puppy with few teeth. The waitress told me he eats porridge:

Look at his long proud tongue, isn’t he cute?

Dog 4: Here is my favorite. This puppy is just a two weeks or so, they are really tiny, and chubby, trying to escape from the my touch. So so adorable:

Dog 5:  A black puppy of the same clan with the Pub no.4. Here is only half of him, look like a giant mouse. He was escaped from my hand faster than the other, ran to their earthen cave, probably where their Mom brought them to life:

Dog 6: A big scary black dog at the Restaurant. Later it ate food that we purposely dropped on the floor for. I guess maybe it is the Mom or the Dad of those Puppies above:

Dog 7: A tiny friend Dog on the Beach. She was shy from camera but liked to be rubbed:

And finally: my Number One Dog. She lives at the Resort I stayed. She was pregnant at the time. However I didn’t know and for the first four days I oftently put my feet comfortably on her body. She was soft and warm so I just thought why not taking advantage when she was underneath my table. That was too bad, I know. However, she must have been the coolest pregnant dog ever. I didn’t see her angry at all. She was around my table all the time. And for the last two days, she almost refused to eat anything except for the food I gave her. And I had to feed her by my hand! Such a sweet memory I . Isn’t it great if I can ask for a Puppy of her later?

But it isn’t the end yet. This Picture is for the Dog Lovers – A couple making a lovely background for two dogs:

Yes, lots of people born with artistic gene. Among people who do things absolutely irrelevant to art, still they have the art in their blood. Like Thanh, a Vietnamese American, a lawyer in profession but draws a lot. Like me, pursuing the real estate development which supposed to be very tough but has a forever love for fashion design and art in general. There are many many more out there who work in fields that look rigid but still nurture the soul of love for art. And yesterday night, to all the people who came to the Concert, that was an extravaganza of love for music, especially for the captivating performance of the amazing Violin Soloist, Stefan Jackiw.

The Programe wrote:

“Violinist Stenfan Jackiw is recognized as one of his generation’s most significant artists, captivating audiences wiht playing that combines poetry and purity with an impeccable technique. He has performed with the symphony orchestras of Boston, Chicago, Philadenphia, Toronto, Pitsburg, Cleveland, Baltimore, San Francisco, Minesota and New York Phihamonic, and toured with the Asian Youth Orchestra in 2006 and the London Philharmonic in 2010. 

In addition to his solo career, Stefan Jackiw is also an active recitalist and chamber musician. He has performed in numerous festivals and concert series, including Ravinia, New York’s Mostly Mozart Festival and Metropolitan Museum of Art, and the Louvre Recital Series in Paris. Stephan Jackiw is also a founding member of the Tessera Quartet, an emerging New York-based ensemble formed under the guidance of the Juilliard String Quartet. 

Born to parents of Korean and German descent in 1985, Stefan Jackiw began playing the violin at the age of four. He holds a Bachelor of Arts from Havard University, as well as an Artist Diploma from the New England Conservatory”. 

Besides of what was printed about Stefan Jackiw in Vietnam, I also want to describe my feeling for his performance even though more than ever I have become clumsy and speechless. I was wearing my daytime working skirt matched with a flowery patterned blouse and at the break, I told Thanh I wish I would have changed it to a proper night dress for a look that deserve to be in the crowd fantasized by Stefan’s music. The sounds from his violin was so special and his look was so in sync with the poetic expression of his magic fingers. For the 1st half of the Concert, I thought I was in a kind of dream, living the moments of beautifully purified sounds reflecting how this world is tendering, exciting and worth of staying.

Stefan Jackiw doesn’t have a look of a young man only 26 years old. He has a deep, self-controlled and mature manor in him. Sitting at the first row, we could see how thin he was, however that doesn’t mean he wasn’t attractive. Quite the opposite indeed. He is phenomenally attractive. Surely all the girls who favor romantic stories must find him like their dream prince. Watching him for nearly an hour, I don’t see even one minute of getting bored. His face structure is so well-defined that he looks extremely hot at every angle. His sleek body is well-blended with the simple material and style of his clothes. Perfect for a dream needed to revitalize this real life. He could have come straight out of the paintings of the Victorian age anytime without making people raise an eyebrow. I don’t think I have seen anything as beautiful as this on the stage before! Does Stephan Jackiw knows he is one of a kind?

I have become Stephan Jackiw’s lifetime fan from last night. I know I am. Thanh wrote an e-mail to him and got his reply the next day, which she forwarded to me in excitement. I admired her of that. I envy her a bit. She did it very naturally as if she wrote to other long-time -no-see friend. I want to be an American someday, to tell all the world what I really think about a man and approach him without a hesitation. She told me: “be yourself, he maybe just cool as any other guys, you never know”. I cannot do that. I need tons of never-cracking to claim that I will be his fan forever. In silence of course.

Art can enrich human’s life and open our eyes to the multiple existent forms of feelings for this wonderful walk at our life and nature. Art is incredibly powerful fore sure. And music, one of the very core components of Art can lead us to know that ourselves are precious by bringing us to the feast of the sounds!

Stephan Jackiw and Richard Pontzious (Artistic Director & Conductor) greeting the audience from stage: 

Stephan Jackiw – picture taken form the Concert’s Booklet:

And finally, Thanh and me in front of the Opera House before the Concert: 

The most essential piece to me is mobile phone, which I use averagely 2 years each. I change mobile only when it becomes unusable. Once I settle, those with better features are not optional at all. My current phone is a white I-phone 3Gs 16GB only and not until it breaks or something shall I think of changing to a new one. It has been a great solution for my reading habit. I read lots and lots on the move, as long as quickly run-out the battery allows. I love it and it has rarely failed me, always there to occupy the free time at the inconvenient condition of opening laptop or books.

Secondly, it must be the laptop. I don’t think I can do any work without it. Of course sometimes I do write on paper but most of the time my thoughts are written and arranged properly on the screen. My work requires lots of writing and reading, so no strange that there was a time that laptop was literally my hard-pillow. Mac is always my first choice and the 13” MacBook Air sold to me by a close friend has been my latest computer. He found it slow and not capable of running heavy programs but for me it is perfect in design and weight and basic functioning. The latest launch of MacBook Air is phenomenal and so desirable but that only makes me love my current one more.

Lastly, it is my glasses. I am short-sighted so the glasses are really helpful. Sometimes I may forget it at home and the consequence is clear, I am just so visually handicapped. No wonder when traveling alone, I extremely need it.

Some people may say, modern society produces the addiction on machines like the way those above mentioned stuff are manipulating my life. However, I don’t think so. The machines have made people’s life more productive and better progressed. Communication still going on despite of distance and discussion context, things get to be done on the computer no matter of where, ideas are delivered into products thanks to many tools that built in the laptop… Are you similarly happy with your list of several things you can’t live without, like me?

A year ago, with other four friends we were laughing loud at this street conner at the same cool summer night. Everyone was very tired after a day hanging out at the beach but still wanted to linger on the out-door chatting. HUE Beer was cheap and could run non-stop. Summer night was refreshing like the energy of youth. Life at its easy form of breathing fresh air and talking with the aim to make other smile was so sweet. Each of us was different in look, in hobbies but somehow close because we both shared the passion to accomplish what we were living for. Some experienced taking things light, those like me having a more serious approach. However, all to aim to liberate our minds and we smiled the night through.

This evening that was only me sitting and thinking of that memory which I didn’t mention a word a year ago. The sweetness of friendship can be felt so deep inside. The de-facto existence that we shall never “drinking the same water on the same river” is clearer than ever. Treading back to memory is sometimes good and sometimes bad. Am I bringing home the good or the bad?

Since Thao Griffin told me of her friend finding a piece of land near the Old Town and the Thu Bon River a year ago, she had set off a desire  to own such property in me. How funny that it has faded in her due to other commitment to her husband now living in his home country and her two kids about to move there for good. Thus in me the idea of living several months per year in Hoi An has become more and more a real fact. I started to see myself studying the home styles that I think suitable for the culturally rich Hoi An. My book-self now has several lines full of both beach house and country house books, and landscaping and water design. I was certainly pondering too much beyond what needs for a private home. However, that was so fun and encouraging to do. I found it very entertaining too, a way of learning without any pressure but pure joy.

Speaking of that, I remembered what my friend – Win told me when I mentioned my latest interior design addition with a big grin. As an architect, he saw what I am trying to do was getting me to nowhere. I was unable to explain to him how that was important to me. Such self-learning process has gotten me closer to creativity and imagination whilst still provided a clear logic clue. When art relates to functioning and logic, and calculation, I feel like I am on my turf. I like that and especially when the outcome can be applied on my own possession, I hope he shall reduce his oppression to diminution.

Compensating for the last two days going around Hoi An during the mid-summer’s heat, I have found two pieces of land which I like. One has good size and convenient access to everywhere, one is a bargain and potential when the new bridge being completed. Most important of all, I have gotten better understand of local lifestyle, what works for them and what they view profitable in land valuing. The similar concept is there but the priority of living criteria so different. For me, a distance of 2 kms is like nothing but for them, that leads to a huge pricing gap. A bit tricky somehow when I am trying to get to their momentum whilst they base their decision on guessing the wave of buyers mostly from Hanoi and other provinces. Anyway, few days of trying speak for nothing. I still have plenty of time to explore. That’s the land for my first country home built in the old City I love dearly so it deserves to take all the time it needs. Besides, isn’t it a fair reason for me to be back to the lovely town often?